There are some advantages to being an older(er) professional. One of them is that I’ve been around long enough to see one trend after another come and go. As as an adoption specialized therapist, the one trend I have’t seen is the one in which the well being and the mental health of the adoptive parents takes center stage. Well friends, that is about to change.
For years I’ve been told that “you chose this life”, or that if I just got my child to one exciting new therapy method (or if I got licensed to practice it myself), or if we attended the new star of the day’s workshop, then all would be well.
Okay – we all know now that for some of us things are not going to change fast enough, if at all. Truly, there are some children for whom any therapy will work, and there are some children for whom no therapy will work. Either way, there are parents who are living a day to day life of stress and chaos and it’s time the attention shifted to them. Maybe your child will get better, maybe she won’t, but in the meantime, what about you? I don’t think it’s enough to simply survive – if we only get one life – then it should be a life worth living, not a life that we have to stumble through, never knowing what kind of pain each day will bring.
I know our kids eventually grow up – but really, does anyone actually think the pain and stress ends then? Get real!
I will get a lot of criticism from my position on this. I know that other professionals, other parents, and the kids as well, don’t want to talk about what happens to the parents who raise severely traumatized children. Oh well, I’m going to do it anyway – popularity was never my goal.
So, one such parent (check out her April 19th post), an enterprising type who refuses to be a victim of a child’s trauma, has contacted EFT expert Brad Yates who in turn, has agreed to do a teleseminar for traumatized parents. The date is May 3rd and the details are in this link. I have great respect for Mr. Yates (I use the same method – EFT tapping, but that’s not the only reason I respect him) and I would encourage anyone to participate in this event.
I”m also doing the same type of thing now- workshops for traumatized parents, not just adoptive parents, but any parents who have raised children with serious mental illness or extremely challenging behaviors. I feel called to do these, and I won’t do any other kind of training anymore – it’s take care of parents time for me now.
My first is in Victoria BC on June 1st. You can email firstname.lastname@example.org to register or wait till I get the event brite thingy up on my blog. The fee is $100 plus tax and it will be at the Harbour Towers hotel, only a block for the city’s beautiful inner harbor. We’ll be bringing the workshop to the US in the fall. If you think there would be sufficient interest in your community, let me know, and we’ll see about planning one there. For sure places are Seattle and Atlanta, the rest have yet to be scheduled.
I feel so strongly about this. We’ve all been trying so hard to care for our kids and do our part to make this a better world, but many of us end up bruised and battered and almost destroyed emotionally, and it’s time we started healing ourselves.
If you would like to attend the June 1st healing workshop – hit the eventbrite button on the sidebar and you can register there.
Hey, have your best day possible.