Opportunity for change…?
So, one of my littles is going into an early puberty – complete with Attitude and a compulsion to wear skanky clothes at every opportunity. As I fasten my seatbelt for the inevitable bumpy ride ahead, I realize that this is an opportunity for me to do something different as I parent yet another p0tentially acting out adolescent.
This time around, I would like to have more patience, be more understanding, be less reactive, and in general, I’d like to become a saint of some sort. In reality, I don’t think I can do it. My teens often think I’m an awful parent who doesn’t care about them. You all know how that goes. Just once, I’d like to avoid that stuff because at this point in my life, it’s getting boring and routine. Of course, it’s all new to this particular little and so maybe I need to be respectful of the fact that she may need to hate me for a while. Nope, don’t think I can do that.
If anything, I likely have less patience despite having more understanding because I know that very little of how I behave toward her is going to change much of she does over the next few years. I’ll do what I always do – I’ll look for ways to stay connected – going to movies together, going shopping together, gardening together, the two of us will take a road trip once in a while, and anything else I can think of that gives us a few moments of respite in the turmoil of hormones and working out old abandonment issues (her, not me).
I try to be open so I’ll look for new ways to do this, but I don’t think there are many out there that I haven’t tried and I just keep coming back to that old stand by – stay sane, stay rested, stay committed to my daughter, and stay focused on what is good on this ride. I will also, at times, get angry, get frustrated, and on occasion I will even become punitive despite knowing that it’s ineffective and just plain wrong, but like I said, sainthood isn’t in the cards for me. 
Well, have your best day possible, and if you have the time, please check out my other blog.
Did you enjoy this post? Why not leave a comment below and continue the conversation, or subscribe to my feed and get articles like this delivered automatically to your feed reader.
Haha – my 5th daughter (9th child) is just entering puberty and you’d think it would get easier just knowing how they HAVE to act out. The eye rolling, the snarkiness, the overall attitude just gets under my skin. I think I have less patience for the silliness because it’s such a time stealer and ultimately they are just gonna have to work thru it at their own pace (please let it be quick!) no matter how much I want it to be over. I think we’d have to be continuously medicated to even approach saintliness when a tween/teen is screaming about how you never do anything for HER and everything for everyone else. It doesn’t matter how untrue it all is and how ridiculous it sounds – the truth has no place in their feelings of persecution whatsoever. The saints certainly have no competition here!